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Tuesday 18 October 2011

35/365 - Overcoming Painful Lessons

"When experience is viewed in a certain way, 
it presents nothing but doorways into the domain of the soul. 
- Jon Kabat-Zinn

Openness means being receptive.  Life will present you with innumerable lessons, none of which will be useful to you unless you recognize them and are open to their inherent value.  These lessons will show up every day of your life, and as difficult as some of them may be you need to change your perception and come to see them as gifts, or guides along your path toward living as your authentic self.

[...] I am often asked how people can recognize their lessons.  My response is that each person's lessons are always self-evident; it is just a matter of what lenses the person is wearing at the time.  If they are wearing the lenses of resistance, they may become angry or bitter and this stubbornness will prevent their personal growth.  If they are wearing lenses of openness and clear discernment, they will gain a deeper understanding of what different life situations can teach them.

[...] How can we move from resistance to openness?  By first recognizing the feeling of resistance.  Resistance usually manifests itself physically in a clenched jaw, a tightness in the chest, or sighing.  Mentally, it shows up in thoughts like, "Why do I have to deal with this issue?  I don't want this, I don't need it, I don't like!"  Once you discover where in your mind or body resistance anchors itself, you can more easily identify it in the future.

The next step is to remind yourself that you have a choice.  You can either continue with this resistance and feel badly or you can learn whatever the lesson is there to teach you.  Presenting yourself with a choice allows you to see that you have control over your resistance and how you choose to deal with life's challenges.

The last step is to ask yourself, "Am I willing to give up the resistance and learn whatever lesson is presenting itself?"  Remember, if you want to truly live from your authentic self, you must be open to learning all the lessons you are given so that you may grow into the person you want to become."  - Cherie Carter-Scott Ph.D. (If Life is a Game, These are the Rules)


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